NYT Article on Japanese Art of Grieving Miscarriage

jizo-statues

Last night, I read this recent New York Time article on the Japanese art of grieving a miscarriage (see link below). It touched my heart and I thought the statues were adorable. Although I’ve never had a pregnancy or miscarriage, I sometimes think the grief of infertility isn’t so different, especially once the possibility of having children is gone. I think traditions and ceremonies like this are good and important. I think it’s also helpful to find ways to make losses like these tangible with something like a monument stone or statue. All the better, if the grieving can be supported by your family and community. We shouldn’t have to grieve these losses in private, alone, as if nothing of significance has happened. Having a ritual like this is lovely.

Although I don’t have an actual, physical child to mourn, I have lost those several children of my heart, of my hopes and dreams. I’m still hoping and planning to adopt. In the meantime, the work of grief continues.

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3 responses to “NYT Article on Japanese Art of Grieving Miscarriage

  1. Fascinating. I’ll have to check out the article. I relate to you when you write, “Although I’ve never had a pregnancy or miscarriage, I sometimes think the grief of infertility isn’t so different.” The only time I conceived in my TTC history was when I had an IVF transfer in May. Although my status was PUPO and I didn’t have a beta higher than 5, two souls were in my uterus for 2 weeks. They’re due date is coming up soon. They’ve been born into heaven for almost 9 months.

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  2. I saw this too. When I went to a pregnancy loss support group the topic of memorialize get came up often and I think this article speaks to that. It’s such a taboo subject and having an object to represent the loss or hold the grief is very powerful.

    Liked by 1 person

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